Many young people ask us: "What is necessary in order to begin a journey of vocational discernment?” Well, something that is extremely necessary in order to understand one’s own vocation is a Spiritual Guide! Every soul is unique and has its own particularities. Each person has different experiences, thoughts, and ways of acting; and only the Lord, who knows us profoundly, knows which person is best suited to lead us. For this reason, the choice of a Spiritual Guide is not something that happens by chance, but is the fruit of prayer and of the signs given by God.
Here is a reflection from St. Francis de Sales about the spiritual guide:
“When young Tobias was told to go to Rages, he said, I do not know the way at all. His father replied, Well, go and find someone to be your guide (
Tobit 5:2,4). Similarly, I say to you, dear Philothea:
If you want to set out earnestly on the path of devotion, find some good person to guide and direct you. This is the most important advice. The devout Avila writes that in whatever way you search ‘
You will never find the will of God with such certainty than by following the path of this humble obedience so much recommended and practiced by all the devout persons of the past.’ […]A faithful friend, says Holy Scripture
(Sirach 6:14, 16), is a strong defense: whoever has found one has found a treasure. A faithful friend is the medicine of life and of immortality: those who fear the Lord will find one. These divine words, you will note, refer principally to immortality, for which it is necessary to have, more than anything else, this faithful friend to guide our actions by his advice and counsel and so keep us safe from the snares and deceits of the evil one. He will be like a treasure of wisdom to us in our difficulties, sorrows and failures. He will serve as a medicine to soothe and comfort our hearts in our spiritual illnesses. He will protect us from evil and help to improve our good. When spiritually ill, he will prevent it leading to death since he will help us to recover.
But who will find such a friend? The Wise Man answers: those who fear the Lord
(Sirach 6:16), that is, the humble who earnestly desire their spiritual progress. Since it is so very important for you, Philothea, that on this holy journey of devotion you travel with a good guide,
pray very earnestly to God to give you one after his own heart, and do not doubt. Even if it is necessary to send an Angel from heaven, as he did for young Tobias,
he will give you a guide who is good and faithful.
Always look upon this guide as an Angel, that is, once you find him do not consider him as an ordinary man. And do not put your trust in him or in his human knowledge but in God.
God will give you grace, and speak to you through this man, putting in his heart and in his mouth whatever is needed for your happiness. So much so that you should listen to him as to an Angel come down from heaven to take you there. In your dealings with him open your heart, with complete sincerity and fidelity, clearly disclosing to him the good and the bad in you without pretending or concealing. In this way, the good in you will be assessed and made more secure, and the bad will be set right and cured. So you will be given relief and strength in your troubles, and moderation and control in your joys. Have very great confidence in him along with a holy reverence, in such a way that reverence may not lessen confidence nor confidence hinder reverence. Entrust yourself to him with the respect of a daughter for her father, and respect him with the confidence of a son in his mother. In short, this friendship should be strong and gentle, entirely holy, entirely sacred, entirely divine and entirely spiritual.
And that it may be so, choose one from a thousand, writes John of Avila. And I insist, choose one from ten thousand, for those who are fit for such a task are very few indeed.
He must be full of charity, of knowledge and of prudence. If he lacks any one of these three qualities, there is danger.
But I tell you once again, ask God to give you such a person and when you find one give thanks to God. Be faithful and do not look for others. Rather, move on with simplicity, humility and confidence, for your journey will be full of happiness.”